Parenting a preteen comes with unique challenges – from physical changes and hormones to attitude shifts and increasing demands for independence. In today’s digital age, parents face an additional challenge: keeping their tweens safe online.
Even if social media is off-limits, your child likely interacts with others online through video games, chat programs, or school message boards. This raises important questions for parents:
- How can I ensure my tween’s online safety?
- What defines good digital citizenship for young people?
- What do experts recommend regarding screen time and rules?
- How can I help my child make responsible online choices when I’m not present?
Your Relationship Matters
According to our “Fostering Healthy Screen Habits” podcast, your relationship with your child plays a crucial role in their digital safety. Caroline Knorr from Common Sense Media explains, “Studies show that maintaining a positive relationship with your kids around media helps them make better, more age-appropriate choices – especially when parents are involved in guiding those choices.”
Starting the Conversation
Simple discussions about media and online content can significantly influence your child’s choices. Try these conversation starters:
- Discuss their experience with video games like Fortnite or Pokemon Go
- Ask about their favorite websites and what makes them appealing
- Share why you choose certain shows or apps
- Invite their input on family rules for online behavior
- Explain your values regarding media consumption
Remember Knorr’s advice: “While tweens might act disinterested in your opinion, they always care what you say. Parents remain extremely influential when they participate in the conversation between kids and media.”
Building Digital Citizenship
The American Association of Pediatricians recommends two key elements for children six and older:
- Consistent boundaries
- Ongoing communication about online safety and respect
Digital citizenship extends beyond personal safety – it’s about creating a safer online environment for everyone. “Digital citizenship means being a responsible internet user,” says Knorr. “It encourages children to consider the person behind the screen.”
Preparing for the Unexpected
Despite using protective tools like ad blockers and restricted content settings, unexpected situations will arise. Here’s how to prepare:
- Plan ahead for difficult topics
- Think about how to address sensitive subjects like sex or drugs
- Develop responses that align with your family’s values
- Avoid immediate reactions of shame or judgment
- Build trust through open communication
- Encourage your child to discuss concerning online content
- Use your relationship to build resilience
- Maintain an open, judgment-free dialogue
Creating Safe Online Boundaries
Psychologist Dr. Ruth Burtman recommends developing a family media plan that promotes both safety and respect. Key components include:
- Discussing online rules collaboratively
- Creating a written agreement with your child
- Maintaining appropriate parental oversight
- Explaining your monitoring approach
Expert Tip
For detailed guidance on creating a family media plan, including Dr. Burtman’s specific recommendations, check out the “Fostering Healthy Screen Habits” podcast. You’ll discover:
- Video games’ impact on brain development
- When to consider a screen detox
- Screen time’s effects on physical health
- Benefits of co-viewing content with your tween
- Strategies for meaningful discussions about online activity
Remember: While independence is important, tweens still need parental guidance to navigate the digital world safely. Maintaining open communication and clear boundaries helps create a foundation for responsible online behavior.
